I have trust issues. It takes time for me to trust new people. Maybe it’s because I’m too judgmental at times, maybe because my judgement cant actually be trusted as i develop feelings towards others too fast —whatever it is, or maybe there’s actually no reason for that.
Then I met you.
Yes, we might not have any other choice but to stick together. Yes, the circumstances forced us to be there for each other. And no, I’m not complaining. I couldn’t ask for a better way to welcome undeniably one of the best things in my life.
I initially thought that our relationship would be like the ones I saw in chick flicks, where we smile to each others, pretend to adore one another, but deep down we hate each other’s gut. I thought a month would never suffice to get to know others, let alone to build a strong relationship. Well, at least I wasn’t all wrong with the latter.
It took time. We took a longer time. One month wasn’t enough.
We had our drama. We had our badmouthing moments. Oh yes, we even hated each other at times.What can I say? We were different and we came from different worlds. But we kept on dancing, we kept on talking, we kept on walking. And you, you helped me to remember the steps, you reminded me to calm down and catch my breath when things got terrible, you even helped me to put on my fake eyelashes.
The month ended too fast, and yes, it still wasn’t enough to get to know each other well. But then again, I didn’t realize that we had smeared a foundation to what later would be a beautiful courtship.
Days passed by and almost no week passed by without us meeting. We talked, we laughed, we got mad, we ran behind the governor, we danced for my favorite public official, we tried new places to eat, and I guess we fell for each other.
There were times when I wanted to strangle you with my hairnet but there were times when I couldn’t think of anyone else to run to. It was a love/hate relationship, but it was love most of the times.
This might sound sappy, but as our year comes to an end, I gotta say the three words: I love you.
But above all, thank you.
Thank you for being there for me —for the hugs, the make up sessions, the love. You might love me for being the bubbly one at any given time, but you somehow stick with me when tears were flowing from my eyes.
Thank you for making me believe that everything will be great in its own time. Thank you for making me believe that waiting —yes, for a year— wouldn’t end in vain when you know what you’re aiming for and when you know what to do in the mean time. Thank you for making me believe the cheesy line of ‘kalau jodoh ngga kemana‘ is a legit thing.
Thank you for letting me be myself, even when I couldn’t tone down my criticism, even when I turned into a crazy heartbroken girl, and for still loving me with all my perks and edges.
Thank you simply for being in one of the best years in my life. Thank you for the fun hours, thank you for the sleep-deprived nights, thank you for the sunny days we spent together.
For all the sentimental reasons, for all the rational reasons, well, even for no reason at all, I hereby say thank you, and again, I love you.
Happy anniversary, Si Pitung sayang!