I work best under pressure, but I crack under stress. It’s not easy to get me to that state as I’m usually able to multitask and I think best during the critical hours. And yes, like the movie “I Dont Know How She Does It”, I do make to-do-lists in my sleep. But sometimes things go haywire, but well, the show must go on.
Thankfully, I got my mantra. It is sung by Jason Mraz and James Morrison. Proven since 2009.
The key is to never play it on regular occasions. Save it for the times you really need a good cry and a friend to tell you that all the things that make you panic is only a fault in mother nature’s sewing machine —everything will be fine in no time.
Then, when the tears have stopped and you finally can think clearly, start over.
If I have to point out the best advice I’ve gotten these past 2 years, it’s this: “Take baby steps, Del. One step at a time. It’s okay to be afraid and unsure, but never forget to take those baby steps. That’s the only thing you can do.” Someone gave me that piece of gem when I was crazy with my final year thesis and I was about to abort the mission and opt for the easy way out. I took those steps and the words have been my rock ever since.
I dont even know why I’m writing this in the middle of the night. Maybe I just need a good cry. Maybe I’m convincing myself that everything will be fine eventually. Just when you thought that you got it all figured out, life decided to shake things up. Maybe it’s true, there is no such thing as control. Humans are such vulnerable creatures.
And this rambling needs to stop.