Facebook status on July 1st 2009



“Adelia Putri misses that feeling of having a major crush.”

No, i dont mean that feeling of having someone as your bf or dating someone. Well, yes, but that’s not what i mean. What i mean is that silly feeling when you have a crush on someone(s), how suddenly there are butterflies in your stomach and your cheeks are flushing. Yeah, being in the L thing.

I’m single now, like totally single, not dating, sms-ing, being close or whatever with any guy. And before you say anything, i tell you one thing, NO, I’m not complaining about being single nor i’m in an urgent need of a guy nor I basically need someone to fancy me. Nope. It’s just i’ve never been really out of love, like totally empty, plain, even not having little fling or crush or lust with anybody for months. It’s kinda weird, i mean i kinda miss that rush on my blood or that silly blush. I just miss that feeling. My life’s kinda flat these days, because of this silly thingy? i dunno. But yeah, it’s flat. No jolt, no rush, no flush or blush. Nothing’s wrong, it’s just flat. Well, boring.

And before you think that i’m a pschyco girl who loves being surrounded by admirers, nah you’re wrong. I’m not goodlooking enough to be that kind of girl.

(And dont ask about that Paul guy i’ve been stalking on. That guy doesnt even know me. Do i intend to hop in front of him and introduce myself? No way. He knows that I’m that strange Asian who always gazes on him. How can i be creepier? But i miss seeing him around in school, stalking him made my schooldays more interesting. However, chances i’m never gonna see him anymore. I’m leaving Thonon next week.)

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Okay i did some other test.. and they said..

You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that’s why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don’t just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person’s personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn’t meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.

You value your friendships: 75%

You love your friends very much – so much so that it’s actually quite a worry. You may not be able to cope very well when you do lose somebody’s friendship. You are a very sensitive and fragile person, and are therefore likely to get upset easily. You care for your friends and are willing to do anything that they ask you to do. Sometimes this can make your friends think that you are a bit of a nuisance. Nevertheless, people do really love you because your highest priority is your friends.

anyway, reading all these i started to think that i’m kinda a character from those chicklits ive read. the characteristics are just sooo chicklity.its me anyway xoxox

I did this personality test and it turned out to be so right.

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don’t focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

ME BEING POSITIVE.


I’ve never thought that i could be THIS huge…
Oops, not a proper sentence to start a postive post. Okay let me start over again.

I’ve never thought that i could go to France before my twenties, let alone LIVING in France, but now, I’m here, aren’t I? I’ve made it.
I’ve never thought i could survive stranded in the middle of nowhere, where I hadnt known anybody, where people speak alien language, but well, I’m here and i speak their language, right?
I’ve never thought i could be friend with good people here, let alone having bestfriends, but now, I’m surrounded with such nice and sweet people, and I do have bestfriends, like the ones i have back home.
I’ve never thought i’d be strong enough to step away from my previous relationship, that i couldnt bear any thought being alone, that i’m such a vulnerable person. But well, here I am, stronger than before, laughing at the silly girl i became, and thanking God for all of this. I’ve made it through, i even can laugh over things!
I’ve always thought that I’m alone, that I couldnt be extrovert enough to tell anybody my stories or problems, but then I was wrong, right? I do have many people to talk to, to trust, and who’d love to help me. And here I am, much more open to other people. I’ve made it.
I’ve never thought that i could speak English, let alone speaking French.
I was that girl who had brilliant written grammar score but sucked at oral. But well, now I’m not that pathetic anymore, i can stand talking and blabbering in English, and I know that I’m getting better in French. I guess I’ve made it.
I’ve never had a good dose of self esteem and confidence
, trust me. I had been so insecure and never felt good enough, almost of the time. But now, i feel a slight-no, make it big- change inside of me, i know i’m good enough for almost all things, as long as i can put trust in God and myself. I’ve made it.
I’ve never thought i could write so much, but here I am, trying to count how many post, crap notes, and other things i’ve put on my blogs. And how wonderful it is, there some people telling me some of my writings are good and thoughtful (well, sometimes, i mean the good serious normal ones, not my crappy shitty whiny thingy).

I’ve passed those selections back home, I’ve passed my worst and most vulnerable moments, I’ve passed my lonely times, I’ve passed the crap times here, I’ve passed those wonderful moments here, I’ve passed those crying and shitty moments, I’ve passed the language barrier, I’ve passed many things, the bests and the worsts. And I’m still standing still. I’ve made it.

Maybe afterall, I’m no longer that Adelia i used to be. Maybe I’ve changed, i dont know. But after all what I’ve been through, my 4th year in highschool couldnt be any worse or any harder, could it? I’ve made this big year through. It wasnt easy, i told you, especially for the naff and witty and spoiled brat like me. But thank God, I’ve made it through. Now, maybe afterall, going back home and starting (or continuing) my life, wont be a hard pain, n’est-ce pas?

I’ll make through my senior year successfully, graduate with great scores, get a super university (maybe scholarship too? i hope!), mingle and love 2010, lost these bloody kilos, get some jobs, and else. Wish me luck! I’m trying to be positive!

Gros bisous,
Adelia,
votre fille preferèe.

i was just wondering……

is it really wrong that i’m not like others?
is it really wrong…

that i dont have the perfect body image like most of my friends do?
that i think a pet owner who seriously loves his/her pet is kinda idiot?
that i believe in love at first sight?
that i still believe Paris is a city of love?
that i read lots of chick lits and crap novels?
that i’ve played piano since forever and still cant play any chopin?
that i think that you cant build a relationship and even more marriage just from the L word?
that i still think maybe i’ll end up with my first kiddie love someday?
that i take almost an hour before leaving home to choose my outfits?
that i dont care about the side effects of technology, like the cancer from laptop’s radiation?
that i dont give a shit about eating healthy and bio, and how some food will bring you cancer?
that i still want to live an american highschool year, eventhough it’s just impossible?
that i think the hardest part of my exchange year was to get rid of my feeling about that guy?
that i ridiculously really really wanna be San Chai and find a Dao Mind Shi?
that i am honestly still not sure which major to take next year?
that i can feel blank, not feeling happy nor sad for like many times?
that i can eat much then feel guilty but cant find a way to vomit?
that now i think i cant differ whether a food is delicious or not, as long as it’s salty i eat them?
that i secretly have a low self esteem?
that i can really have a bad mood all day just because someone telling me little things that i dont like?
that i seriously hate seniors telling you what to do?
that i still cant speak french clearly to my hostfam?
that i hate thinking about grammars while talking?
that after all these months in france i still often talk in english?
that i still dont like being in another family’s home which doesnt feel like my own home where i can wake up at 2 am and go to toilet without having fear of waking others up or making the dog bark?
that i hate intense sunshine, and i hate when people tell me that i must like the sun strike?
that i dont even bother to try any ski activity even though maybe i’ll never get another chance?
that i think i’ve improved my english here and i feel like i’m having an exchange year in english speaking country instead of french?
that i still cant be close to my hostfam?
that i hate afs weekends because i feel so left out when everybody seems to be goodfriends?
that i have to search for a good topic to talk about with my hostfam?
that i often think that people dont appreciate me?

is it really wrong that i’m tired of following advices and not being me?

4 juin 2009

remember the hot guy i’ve mentioned yesterday? today he was sitting infront of my table at canteen. oh my gosh i couldnt think, i was panicking he was just soooo gorgeous. seriously. eventhough he has a big tendency to be a gay. and i guess his gf (i hope she’s not his gf! lol) knows that there’a a strange and weird indonesian girl who is crazy about this boy. yeah whatever.yeah, thats him on the pic. i know im such a pathetic stalker haha

anyway, i saw a pretty dress, peach with ruffles. so sweet. i hope my mum will let me use it to the prom bcos its kinda ‘open’ i mean it’s a sleeveless dress. but soooo pretty. and i saw a nice pump heels too. i havent bought any. i’m still thinking. anyway i have silver heels at home, i dunno if it’ll match the peach dress. if they match, maybe i’ll buy that dress.

And i did my DELF test too. easy. i thought it’ll be full of grammars bah. i’ll take the level B1 and B2 when i come home.

thats all xoxoxoxo

so i have these two blogs..

why did i make two blogs? it’s just bcos i found out that Blogspot is more ‘open’ and people who dont have a blog still can leave a comment. But i cant just leave my Multiply one since i have many contacts and they seem to be a kind of family for me. So i decided to have two blogs. And now i realize that it’s kinda difficult to maintain both of them. I love the layouts and features of Blogspot but I still prefer my Multiply, since there are always some people who give comments at anything i wrote. So finally i decided to split these two blogs, i will write my random thoughts and else in two languages (or maybe i should start to use french or italian as well? lol). I’ll post my indonesian notes in Multiply, and also some post that i need to hear some comments or suggestion about it. And for this site, i’ll write something random in english, or maybe french if possible (lol) well except for those memoirs thingy that i’ve been posting (will still be going on, i still have like 5 parts of it hehe) it’ll be in indonesian.

So feel free to open the link on the down left tab, the one titled “Salve! Mi Chiamo Adelia!” that’s my other blog 🙂

xoxoxo